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At 3:23 p.m. on 2004-08-16

someone asked me what it was like to be in love...and i told them i dont know..i've never felt 'in love' i'm not

saddened by this for i know what happens when you love well what could happen..you could open up your heart and then have it smashed right in front of you...but you could also feel so good so happy..

sometimes i think why would someone want to feel like shit?over another person?why would you want to feel so much saddness and pain over one little person?? because its not like we chose who we fall in love with..i be if we did..there would be no reason to live..because there would be some girls in love with one boy or one boy in love with some girls it would be one giant mess but then again thats kinda how life is...you'll always want what you can't have..maybe that's why i want a boyfriend or someone just to love me..

not as a friend...but as a lover i guess..i dunno its stupid..but loves everywhere?

so how could i not want to be in love?

to have someone to hold?i mean fucking cartoon characters fall in love...and are loved why can't i be? whats so wrong with me? *stops and rereads what she wrote thinks* how patheic...i am..geez...

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