~life as many"Ups" and "down" but what are they??"Ups" being love,laughing,friends,boys then what? "downs" are? gettting hurt,crying,betrael,lies?sounds like theres a hell and a heaven but we make then our selfs~
i cant be what everyone wants me to be i'm not pretty,not poplaur,not skinny,not perfect like the other girls not the girl everyone likes not the girl every guy wants...i wanna fucking feel alive.i wanna be in love even if in the end i get hurt i wanna find friends who trust me and i trust them but i cant be this cant have this lie.this dream when i'm awake and trying to feel alive my thoughts are shattered but every heartbeat or every perfect girl i see..i would give anything not to be me,to be truly happy truly loved,but lies are these,in a web of pain or confusion.i'm feeling like nothing matters.nothing.it makes me sooo sad to not be able to feel the only way is to cut.to bleed.to make myself feel to try and be something i may never be.i wanna be a good person but how do i be a good person??when i dont even know when i should stop eating...stop being me.......
~lost and confused
This is my thoughts,my rants,my lies,my,mistakes,my tears,my smiles,my world..and how i see it..IF YOU DONT LIKE IT DONT READ IT.