~~Now that we're here, it's so far away All the struggle we thought was in vain All the mistakes, one life contained They all finally start to go away Now that we're here, it's so far away And I feel like I can face the day I can forgive, and I'm not ashamed To be the person that I am today These are my words That I've never said before I think I'm doing okay And this is the smile That I've never shown before Somebody shake me 'cause I I must be sleepingI'm so afraid of waking Please don't shake me Afraid of waking Please don't shake me~~
well i tried
tried and failed...miserably..
to not have a change is worse
then haveing one at all i thought you cared
you told me you did..
guess i should have known..that even you were lieing..
high up on your throne...
i'm sick of hurting..sick of feeling
sick of being so name naivee and trusting
sick of everything even though i have been hurt
as bad as some of my friends..but like in a song
not even the strong can stay smiling for very long..
i hate feeling this way..i hate that i hate...
i have being in love with you..and being lied to...
~~So what i'm just suppose to pretend i dont like yoU?
i dont pretend..i wont hide away...i know what i feel..
So what i'm just suppose to wait for you?wait around till you figure out your feelings?
if you dont care say it..if you dont want to be with me then say itDo not feed me your bull
i wont take it.
So you expect me to be all nice and innocent when you get pissy around me?when you treat me like shit?
fuck that...fuck you..you are not my god...and i am not your goddess on my knees..sorry
So if you can't listen,cant deal with my "shit" then fucking go and dont turn back.
i'm not going to lie...its will hurt...i'm not going to give you my best fake smile~~
well anyways...here i am sitting here drinking my after-you-know-what-shit...i'm not ashamed..not sad...not really any thing..i'm empty..more ways then one..i guess. i dunno..i love him..i admit it...i would like to date him..i admit that too..but i will not sit around and get hurt...i will not be lied to(besides i'm the only person that can lie to me hehe doesnt make sense huh lol)..or anything like that...i will not take his bullshit..i'll give him one more chance to try and get back..i dont really know if that will work...dont really care...lets see how long i can lie to myself..*sighs* i want to cut..but i dont think i will...*looks around*
this week has been so busy damn lol i hadjapanese club on monday..(which is so fucking awesome i love it we do some kind of activity and then watch anime for an hour!!!) then to tuesday hehe today which was FBLA then i have to type some stuff tomorrro..then nothing much...i dunno i love him..i dont fucking know why....i wish i wish i didnt....ARG!!!!!!!
i am lies
i am truth
i am fat
i am youth
i am death
i am life
i am selfishness
i am conceited
i am sick
i am morbid
i am all the things
but i have another motive
i am nothing
i am worthless
i am a razor
i have this other behavior
i am brave
i am bold
but most of everything is getting old
This is my thoughts,my rants,my lies,my,mistakes,my tears,my smiles,my world..and how i see it..IF YOU DONT LIKE IT DONT READ IT.